Domestic abuse victims share survival stories

By PALAK NARULA

LUCKNOW: Life is difficult for Jyoti, a 31-year-old maid who has been a victim of domestic violence. She endured years of physical and mental abuse in her village. Jyoti feels women have been largely overlooked and their exploitation continues to be deep rooted in the Indian society.

“My village is near Sultanpur in Uttar Pradesh. I grew up in a violent household so when my husband abused me, I endured it and thought it was normal. He would come home drunk and throw away the food if it was not to his liking,” Jyoti recalls.

She says that she was deprived of extra care and her essential needs were not fulfilled during the time of her pregnancy. She gave birth to a baby girl which further agitated her husband and he was ready to sell the girl child.

Jyoti could not bear this mental and physical abuse, hence, she came to the city with the help of her elder brother. “Most of the women in our village face these issues but we are helpless. Men run the world and women need to adjust in every phase of their lives. That’s how it works,” Jyoti said.

Another case in point is Savitri, a 23-year-old woman from Bahraich who became a victim of dowry harassment.

At the age of 19, Savitri’s parents fixed her marriage with a 24-year-old man. She wanted to complete her studies but her uncle convinced the family members by saying that the groom’s family was not asking for much dowry and that it is a good proposal.

“On the day of the marriage, we fulfilled almost all the demands made by my in-laws but we could not afford to gift them a new bike since my father was already in debt. This angered my to-be father-in-law and he called off the marriage in front of everyone. This was such a huge embarrassment to my family,” she says. Savitri tried to commit suicide but her family saved her and got her married, two years later to a kind man.

The government has made provisions and laws to condemn these social practices but in many urban and rural places they still exist. There has not been much improvement in the society relating to the crimes against women.

Amanda Seymour of the Humsafar NGO in Lucknow, regularly visits the rural areas of Uttar Pradesh to educate women on domestic violence and how to combat it. She provided them with helpline numbers in case of any predicament. "Women should be empowered and made aware of their rights. Educating men on such issues from an early age is a must as it will help eradicate this patriarchal mindset," she said.


The story first appeared in The Times of Bennett, the lab newspaper produced by the first semester students of The Times School of Media.
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